A quick kidism

No. 2 and I were lying in bed last night snuggling and chatting while No. 1 was in the shower. No. 3 was asleep downstairs in the pack 'n play, The Mr. was off fighting a grocery store fire. As we were chatting, she casually advised me to "think about not putting anyone in time out anymore." When I laughed, she told me it wasn't funny.

What has the presidency come to?

I'm about drawn to tears. I have supported President George W. Bush through a host of criticisms. My argument mainly is that his personality is so no-nonsense, so down home (so what if he said "shit" about Hezbollah and Israel?) that Americans just aren't used to it. Seems to me that we have to have something to complain about.

But the stem cell veto. . . I can't support that. I wish he could live just one day in the shoes of a diabetic or a parent of a diabetic child, or a person with Parkinson's, or the spouse of someone with Alzheimer's--all diseases that have the potential to be cured with the help of stem cell research.

So many others have said it better than I could ever hope to: Mr. Bush, get your head out of your ass.

A kidism

Yes, I know it's not Wednesday.

So, over the weekend after giving No. 2 a shower, I was cleaning out her ears. She's pretty sensitive about them. Well, that's actually an understatement. Her entire first year of life was plagued with ear infections. At six months, the doctors were ready to "tube her," but she was too young. At the first sign of winter, her ears clogged up and she got her first set of tubes around her first birthday. Second set came around her second birthday.

Anyway, so she's being squirmy and screamy while I'm cleaning the waxiness out of her ears. Being the good mom that I am (no, my arm isn't breaking as I'm patting myself on the back), I tried to make the most of it.

Pulling out a loaded Q-tip, I said something to the effect of "ewww, look how gross that is."

The screaming and crying immediately stopped so she could (rather defensively) say, "I didn't put that in there."

What would Dr. Freud make of this?

I have the weirdest sensation of guilt and joy going on right now. Well, actually, it's joy quickly followed by guilt. And then joy again.

On Saturday, the Mr. and I took our older two children two hours away to my parents' house. And then came home. Without them. (The baby stayed with us because I'm still nursing her.)

The woman who watches them during the day while we're at work took her week's vacation this week and drove her family to New York to visit her family. Three kids in a car from Missouri to New York. And one of them is only nine months old. I suppose her nerves will be frayed by the time she gets home. I know mine would be!

But I digress. Last night was the first night home without the little boogers. I felt so relaxed. I felt so unscheduled. I felt quite peaceful. That's the joy part. I'm feeling pretty happy and well, peaceful, these last two days. And I have until Thursday (when Mom will bring The Big Kids home and we will subsequently commit her to the looney bin after having her nerves frayed by my wild ones!).

Here's the guilt part: I don't really feel like I miss them. Last night at 8:30--a full 30 minutes past their bedtime--the phone rang and I thought, "Oh, sh*t! I forgot to call them before bed." It wasn't like I was busy or anything either. Just sitting on the couch reading through some old papers.

So for part of last night and this morning I alternately beat myself up and then scolded myself for beating myself up because even though I'm not counting the hours until I see them again (yet) I have realized that I really, really, really need time to refresh myself. I will be such a better mom for them when they come home.

I should do this more often.